Hi everyone! My name is Katie Reese and I am an Occupational Therapy Assistant at Emerge Pediatric Therapy.
Welcome to back to Emerge Blog, with a new entry in our “Tough Conversations” series. In these conversation starters, members of the Emerge team share their suggestions for ways to approach tougher topics with kids.
Today I want to share some tips for helping your child welcome a new sibling and make the transition to big brother or sister. My family recently welcomed our own new addition!
Tip #1: Share the exciting news!
Talk to your child about the new baby’s arrival and how exciting it will be. Let them know that they will soon have a new baby brother or sister. This doesn’t have to be a long conversation, but more like a trickle of information over time. This will help prepare your child for the transition later on because they will know that a new sibling is arriving.
As the due date approaches, have little conversations about their new role of helper. Help them process their emotions and validate their feelings – it’s okay to have big emotions! Reassure them that they are loved just as much as ever.
Tip #2: Use books to introduce the concept of bringing home a new baby
We have read several books about becoming a big sibling in preparation for this change. Books provide a visual and entertaining way to describe what bringing home a new baby may look like for the older sibling.
Books may address the following concepts:
- Being extra gentle with baby
- Ways to help Mom and Dad with baby
- Teaching baby all kinds of new things as they grow
- Mom and Dad loving big sibling just as much as always
- Realistic expectations: babies cry to communicate, need a lot of sleep, and cannot play immediately
Tip #3: Prepare a basket of helpful items that are easily accessible by your older child
A great way to involve your older child is to empower them to be a helper whenever possible. Create an easily accessible basket with diaper-changing items, approved soft toys and books, burp cloths, etc. that your older child can retrieve for you when needed. This will help your older child feel involved and provide them with an important, age-appropriate job.
Tip #4: Engage in one-on-one time with your older child after baby arrives
Whenever possible, try to create special moments with your older child so they are still receiving individualized attention during this big transition. Babies require a lot of time and energy, so keep these moments manageable for your family’s needs. Small shared moments can go a long way. Some things you can do include reading a book together, playing with their favorite toy, coloring, listening or dancing along to their favorite song, having a favorite snack together, or getting some extra cuddles.
Tip #5: Keep your older child’s routine as consistent as possible
Children often thrive when they have an established, consistent routine. This allows them to know what to expect and when, creating a sense of predictability and stability throughout the day, as well as fostering a feeling of trust and security with caregivers. All of this plays an important role in promoting self-regulation and helping children manage their emotions during transitions.
That said, there are many changes that come with bringing a new baby home. Routines will inevitably need to change. Whenever possible, try to keep your child’s routine the same, but know that it is normal and expect for there to be some adjustments as you navigate this new and exciting journey together. You can co-regulate with your child by managing your own emotions and sharing your calm with them during challenging times.
Looking for additional support?
If you would like more advice specific to the needs of your growing family, please reach out to your Emerge therapist. We are happy to support you and your child during this exciting transition!
Blog by Katie Reese, COTA/L